Dying Away

So we noticed that the praying mantis wasn’t looking quite well shortly after we came back from our trip
There were some spots and discoloration on its body
Thinking that it might be shedding old skin
(yes, we read that praying mantis do renew their coats when they grow bigger)
we told Malcolm that it should be fine

Days went by but the praying mantis seemed to have grown weaker
It didn’t move as much and very often never finished its food
It would still attack its prey with vigor but could only finish part of its hunt

Then a few days ago we came home and found it lying on its back
One of its legs was missing
It could have lost it to the crickets while battling with them

We were sadden by the sight of it
That night we let it stay out of its cage and it sleeps on the TV console
We tried feeding him bits of raw meat from a tweezer
but it barely ate

Then we tried feeding live cricket
It grabbed hold of its prey tight and started eating
We were happy
It seemed to have regain its ferocious self
We were relieved

But things weren’t as good as we thought

The next morning we found the praying mantis lying motionless
The cricket was dead but was left almost untouched
The praying mantis barely ate it

With its legs all curled up, the little creature lay motionless in Malcolm’s hands
Its body had lost its vibrant green and had turned yellowish
Its legs were barely moving
But the tiny movement of its mouth was a sign that it was still alive

For a long while, Malcolm held his little friend in his hands
gently stroking its body and softly calling it
It was a depressing sight
I knew he was desperately hoping that his little friend could sprung back to life

But the truth was
his little green friend was shriveling and slowly dying away



We took him out from school that day
Instead it was a day where he learned about grief and sorrow, life and death



Good Ol Fashioned Love

I love durians
I used to eat them a lot more when I was a kid
I remember tripping over them and bruising my knees when I was about Malcolm’s age
I practically knelt on them
They hurt

I had to refrain from eating them when I was pregnant with both my kids as I had gestational diabetes
but luckily we were living overseas for a large part of our time when Malcolm was little and when I was pregnant with my 2nd child

Durians were scarce
Even rarer to get good ones
Occasionally I ran into those frozen ones
I ended up making cakes from them
Resisting them wasn’t so tough

Here in Singapore, durian doesn’t seem to run out of season
Supermarkets sell them all the time
And they come in varied names and grades and with very different price tag

On some days when my husband came back late from work
He would bagged home some

They cost as much as my 1 week’s grocery
And because I am the only one in the household who is not repulsed by its aroma
and relatively weak when it comes to watching my waistline
I would gobble a few of them late in the night
All by myself
while he chatted on about his day at work

It’s a satisfying and tormenting feeling
It makes me happy and guilty at the same time

The marshy flesh
The sugar rush
His chatter
The silence of the night

It’s love in a good ol fashioned way



Sprouting Tooth Capturing Smiles

I love taking pictures of my kids
but I have to admit that I am not good at taking pictures of them playing together

I often couldn’t decide which one to focus on
Sometimes I end up focusing on neither of them
It’s hard to choose one

I found this picture in my computer
It was taken a year ago
I was focusing on Malcolm and Marcus was slightly out

It was one of those morning when the boys were tossing and tussling in my bed
They were both sprouting front tooth at the same time

It is good to see their happy faces in the morning
I love their toothy grins
They make me smile


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